Wednesday, January 30, 2008

A Myriad of Thoughts

Right now I have a myriad of thoughts running through my head. There is so much going on, in my life, in the lives of my friends and family, in our country and across the globe. Life on this earth is never dull, not for a moment. There is so much to ponder and think and do. So much life to live and things to see.

Even right here, in little ol' Lynchburg there is history on top of history. Civil battle grounds to visit, and just up the road I have tons of family history to shift through. Not to mention I am only 3 hrs from my favorite place on earth-Washington DC!!! The Washington Monument, Lincoln Memorial, Holocaust Museum, Tomb of the Unknown, etc. To think that this nation was founded by godly men (and women) and to see what it is has become.

Yes, right now America is far from godly. Yet, we are a blessed nation. Even with the economic struggle we are facing now, we are better off than in the 1930's. There are jobs out there for people, you just have to be willing to do the work, and not think that you are "above" such a "menial" job.

But even closer to home, there are so many classes offered here that I want to take. I want to take as many counseling classes as possible, as many apologetics classes as possible, as many theology classes as possible. I want to learn. I want to leave here WAY more educated and prepared than I am now.

Food. Food is good stuff. I love to eat. I like pasta, meat, pizza (pepperoni), fruits (bananas, strawberries, kiwis, oranges, raspberries, tomatoes, grapes, pineapple, and so on) and doughnuts (though it has been months that I had one) and chocolate chip cookies, and shortbread. I like mac and cheese with hamburger or chicken, I love apple pie and fast food. I love mexican food and don't even get me started on Churros! Ok, so I'm hungry!!! Maybe I'll snack on a banana, that's healthy!

Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness and self-control. I am writing a little devotional that ties the fruits of the Spirit (just listed) with the description of the Proverbs 31 woman. I have just started. The idea came out of my love and yearning to emulate the Proverbs 31 woman, but I couldn't figure out how to do it in a 21st century way. I am excited about this. I am still working on my other book. Maybe I'll actually be published in the next 5 years!

I guess before I ramble on for another while I should sign off and finish studying, so I can go to bed (I've got a migraine, did I mention that, well it doesn't matter, just means I NEED sleep soon and lots of it). I'm praying for all of you.

May Christ our Lord be with each of you in a special way. May He draw you nearer to Him in a way that brings you more joy and a deeper satisfaction of the knowledge that rests in a right and obedient relationship with Christ.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Jeremiah 29:11

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans for welfare and not for calamity, to give you a future and a hope." (Jer. 29:11 NASB)

The Lord has plans for me, plans to give me a future and hope. Good plans. That is exciting, it should be a peaceful verse for Christians. We can rest assured that God has a plan for each of us, and if God has a plan, than He is going to want to help us accomplish it. God's plan is not secret. God did not say that "Only I know the secret plans I have for you..." Nope. God knows His plan, it is a good one, and He wants to show it to us. How wonderful, how marvelous!!!

Right now, in my spare time I am enjoying reading the Stephanie Plum series by Janet Evanovich. She is a NY times best seller with each book in this series. Stephanie Plum lives in Trenton, NJ and is in her mid 30's. She is a Bounty Hunter, but a bumbling one. She is like the female Barney Fife of bounty hunters. The situations she finds herself in, and as the reader, we go on with her, they are just funny, improbable, down right hillarious! I love these books because I can pick one up and I know that from start to finish, there will be lots of comedy. Mysteries are solved along the way, a few fugitives are brought to justice, but mostly, I laugh.

With everything that has gone in on the past year, I needed something light like Evanovich's books. God knew that I needed something light, and He is using these books to remind me of some important parts of His plan for my life, and for yours. I am about to impart some deep wisdom, are you ready???

God wants us to enjoy our lives! Yep, I said it, God wants us to have fun. Now, our lives are not an endless trip to Disney World. That isn't what I'm saying. I'm saying that God wants us to enjoy this earth. The earth was created for His enjoyment, and ours! We need to be serious about growing in Him, and sharing Him with others. We need to pray and study the Bible, to work our hardest at our jobs, to be the best siblings, parents, friends. There are many serious parts of life, and they should be treated as such. Be that as it may, part of the plan God has for us is for us to ENJOY LIFE. Take time-outs to laugh.

In Ecclesiastes we are told " There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under Heaven.--A time to give birth, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to uproot what is planted. A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to tear down, and a time to build up. A time to weep, and a time to laugh. A time to mourn, and a time to dance." (Ecc. 3:1-4 NASB, emphasis added). God wants us to take the time to laugh.

This week I am going to focus on remembering that there is a time for everything. Over the weekend I spent a lot of time thinking about the loved ones that have gone to Heaven, and my friends and family that are hurting right now. Life on this earth is hard, there is a lot of pain. Sometimes it seems that the 21st century has only brought more pain than past decades. I don't know, since I've only been around since the 80's. I do know this, there is a lot of evil in the world. It is easy to get caught in the time to mourn, and to stay in that season. Yet, there is a season for that, but there is also a season for laughter. Mourning has to end. We can't let ourselves mourn forever, that isn't part of God's plan.

Reading Jeremiah 29 was a good reminder to me, that God has a plan for me, and that plan includes good stuff, and hard stuff. The hard stuff makes that good stuff seem even better. If we all lived at Disney World the joy and the magic of the place would wear off and it would seem everyday.

We don't live in a perpetual party land, so when we do party, it is special. Laughter is a gift from God. I need to remember that, and to let myself not feel guilty when I can laugh, honestly laugh. For too many years now I've kept part of my heart in this perpetual gloom. I've felt like, I owe the girl that died on February 2, 2002 something, and that something was guilt. Guilt for living, for being joyful. She should have died that night. There was gun, right there. Yet, for some reason I survived. Through all the horror, pain, humiliation, fear, pain, fear and anger, I survived. Yet, the old me died that night. I'm not the same person I was before.

God did not want the rape to happen. Of course He didn't. God loves me. Jesus, died for me, that is how much He loves me. He loves me, even with all my sins (and there are many) and imperfections, Jesus came down and said "Jessie, I love you, and to show you just how much I love you, I'm going to let myself be beaten to within an inch of my life, so badly that my Mom, My own mother won't even recognize me. That isn't enough though, I love you more than that. I love you so much, that after I'm beaten, I am going to drag a heavy beam across town and up a hill, bleeding all the way. Being tormented and taunted as I go. Then, at the top of the hill I still won't have loved you enough. I am going to let men erect the cross, tie me to it, and then put huge nails through my wrists, and literally impale me, so that when the cross is stood up and pounded into the ground, I will remain on it. But, the nails are not holding me there. I am there, because, Jessie, I love you. I love you. I don't care what you did, I don't care what your sins are, your temptations, your imperfections. I love you, because I created you, and you are perfect to me."(Jesus). I'm not the only one. He thought of each of us as He went through all that.

So no, Jesus didn't do all that just sit and watch me be raped by two evil men with a gun. Jesus wept as it happened. Yet, He had a plan for me. A plan that would bring me a future and hope. For so many men and women, after a rape there is no hope. There is no future. The repercussions of the rape bring them to end their own lives. As hard as it is to go on, I did, and I still do, because Jesus loves me and He has a plan for me. It would be selfish of me to end the race early. I want to accomplish the tasks He has for me. Because I love Jesus. I love Jesus, because He first loved me.

So what is His plan? Well first of all it is for me to grow in wisdom and knowledge, of Him and of life and all that living on earth means. Secondly, I need to share my testimony and help others. I need to show other women and children, that yes it is possible to not only survive sexual abuse, but to thrive. The people we are before the abuse die, they are gone. Replaced by people that are acutely aware of the evil of this world. Yet, people that are also able to learn how to honestly laugh again, and not feel guilty. People who can go on to accomplish amazing and wonderful things. Thirdly, I need to share Jesus with everyone I meet. My love for Christ should be evident to everyone I meet. That is His plan for me.

Will I get married and have kids? I hope so, someday. I want 3 kids (two of my own, and adopt one). But is that necessary for me to have a fulfilled and Christ honoring life? NO. This is new for me. I am learning that as much as I want to get married, and I do. We all know that I do, but as much as I want to get married, even more than that I want to live for Christ. I want to share my testimony with as many people as possible. I want to help women and children learn how to live in Christ's love and thrive after abuse. That is my passion. That is God's plan for what happened, that is why I survived the attack, and was not murdered.

"For I know the plans I have for you." THANK YOU LORD!!!

How to Act Christian

Now, I don't have all the answers, in fact I have very few of the answers, but I do know this-there are ways to turn people off from the gospel.

There is a church that picketed the funeral of Matthew Shepherd years ago (the Wyoming kid that was murdered for being gay). These people picket military funerals of dead soldiers that claimed to be gay. Now, they are planning on picketing Heath Ledger's funeral.

This is NOT the way to spread the gospel. It is hate in itself. People are not going want to have Christ in their lives if they see that we don't treat people with love. I don't understand the homosexual life-style. It seems weird, for one thing the parts don't fit and you have to use parts that were not designed for that activity or else use man made parts. Why use man made stuff, if you can get the real thing? But, that is just me.

Just because I think the Bible is clear on the homosexual issue, and I don't understand the attraction, does not mean that I hate, am afraid of, or think those people are abhorant. I love them, I love all people, because we are all created in the image of God, and we are His beloved children. God wants us all in Heaven, and He rejoices when 1 person chooses to accept Him. That is amazing. That is cause to celebrate and love all people. God calls us to be like Him. He doesn't picket people who choose to sin, especially pre-believers.

In lieu of picketing funerals of heroes or celebrities, why don't we hold prayer vigils for their families and friends, go out and hand out tracts in our neighborhood, fast. Spend the time doing something that will have a positive affect on the kingdom. Something that will show the world that we love them, because God loves them. There was a time when each of us were pre-believers, a time before we could call Christ our Saviour. We were just as lost as everything else.

As Dr. Wheeler says "Lost people act...LOST". If you don't know that something is wrong, and you enjoy doing that thing, why would you stop? Lost people, pre-believers do not grasp the law and words of Christ. They do not have the Holy Spirit directing their lives. Why do we in the Christian community expect them to act like we do???

This church, and people like them just irk me, and lead to pray earnestly. They are not reflecting the Christ that I know and serve. Their "god" is not the Holy Father, it is fame, recognition, diversivness, anger, etc. They are picketing things in order to plant seeds, so God can reap a harvest. They are picketing to get known, to have their 15 mins of fame. That is so sad. It sad that it is being done in the name of Christ. I think things like this grieve Christ. They are just erecting more barriers for a majority of people.

Pray. Read the Scripture, and pray. Our world bites. I once heard a quote, and I think it is appropriate at this time.

"For the Christian earth is the closest they will come to living in Hell. But for the non-believer earth is the closest they will come to living in Heaven." (unknown author)

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Time-Out







I tried to post a couple of days ago, and for some reason the post I wrote disappeared before it was saved on my blog. I had said some interesting stuff too! Oh well, life is still good. Right now it is cooler and there is a rumor that it might snow here tomorrow!!!!! That would be totally iced (literally and figuratively).


As I was dealing with my frustrations over the lost blog I began to think that it might be God's way of telling me to take a time-out and really just focus on Him. That is what I'm doing this afternoon. My homework is finished for the day (I love the 1st week) and I don't have anything going on till church tonight. So this afternoon is dedicated to pondering and absorbing the wonderfulness that is my Lord.


So often I get caught up in learning about God and learning how to be a good counselor and Christian that I forget to BE one. With some things in my life having shifted of late I am taking this semester to refocus and make sure that my priorities are in line with God's priorities. This semester is going to be dedicated to jump-starting a deep love for my Savior. God is so awesome and He has done so much for me that I can't help but want to just spend all my time with Him.


The NT tells us to "Pray without ceasing". We are to always be in tune with God. God should be our first love. We should talk to God more and know God better than we do our spouse, children, siblings, friends. God should be number 1 on all our lists. In order to achieve this we have to be in constant communication with Him, through prayer and Scripture, and how we live our lives.


Our prayers do not have to be stuffy prayers. Greet the Lord in the morning with a "Good morning, thanks for today" End the day by telling Him good night. In lieu of getting mad at the drivers around you, pray for them (I'm preaching to myself on that point). God loves to hear from us. Remember "If you don't know what you are doing pray to the Father, He loves to help" (the Message-James). Make God part of all that you do. Sometimes it is intentional, but I have found that the more I am intentional about including God the less I have to think about it, it becomes as normal as breathing. In fact, it is more important than breathing, for He is the one that gives us each breath.


As a side note I will comment upon the big event happening on Sunday. You know what I am talking about, The Green Bay Packers hos the New York Giants in the NFC Championship game. According to TWC there is suppossed to be snow Saturday and Monday. I am praying not for the Packers to win, because I figure there are probably some Christians out there praying for the Giants (though I don't see how, the Pack is clearly the right team to cheer for). I am praying for snow. Snow gives us the upper hand. I am also praying for no major injuries (though if Strahan & company were to get a few sprained ankles and broken legs I wouldn't be disappointed, seriously now, I don't want anyone on NY too injured).


I think that as long as the front line of the Packers protect Favre and we can protect against the pass on the other side of the ball than we will be well on our way to the Super Bowl in the sun. I do not think we are going to have to score we did against Seattle (though a foot of snow would really help). It will be interesting to watch.


"For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. For God sent not His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved." (John 3:16-17)

God came to love us and to save us. No matter what we do, if we call

on the Lord we will be forgiven. How freeing and magnificient. It gives

me the confidence to boldly live my life. To do my best, but to know that

even when I sin I will be forgiven. GOD ROCKS!

Sunday, January 13, 2008

New Year

For the new year I have decided many things.
1. I have no effect on the weather, therefore I will only let it affect me in a positive way.
2. My body is a temple, and I want it to look as good as possible, and be well maintained.
3. The Packers rock (not a new revelation, but should be shared)!
4. No matter how in depth I am in my studies while at seminary I still need to have a personal Bible study.
5. Life is good.

Talking about the Packers, they just crushed the Seahawks. I was a little nervous after Grant's ignominious beginning, but he redeemed himself and the Packers went on to score 40+ points during the game. In fact, we had such a lead that Aaron Rodgers (who really needs to toughen up BTW) came in during the last bit of the game. The white out conditions toward the end, looked like fun. Snow and cold, that is how a real football game is played at Lambeau!!! It was a great game.

Classes begin for me on Monday. I am taking 12 credits (4 classes). I am looking forward to all of them. I will be in NT (Pauline Epistles), Church Growth and Evangelism, Survey of Christian Counseling, and Western & New Religions. A good mix of classes I think. Should keep me on my toes and keep my interest. I have already started perusing my textbooks and doing what I can to be a bit ahead of the game.

I also continue to work on Greek and I would like to eventually take the course. Looking back on life in college, I don't regret taking any of the classes I took, but I do wonder about some classes I wanted to take but didn't. I don't Greek to be like that. I know that I can do it, I just need to give myself a head start.

I support Mike Huckabee for president, but more on politics later. Right now, it is early Sunday morning (1230am) and I need to get to bed, so I can be at the early church service later. I am anticipating a week full of God's love, blessing, and growth in Him. I pray you are the same.