Ok, so I am officially using this blog as a tool in my need to procrastinate! I just can't get motivated this weekend, and that is a bad thing because I have 2 big midterms this week (1 on Tuesday and the other on Thursday)! Plus I have 3 papers to finish (ok...start!). I'm never this unmotivated. I normally even LIKE school and generally enjoy the process! Humbug (that is my word, as I'm trying to quit cussing)!
I am enjoying my classes, I see that what I'm learning is valuable, not only for what I want to do after I graduate (May 9, 2009, but who's counting!?!) but as it is helping me grow spiritually. I love to write (anyone who reads this blog knows that), so writing papers shouldn't be that bad, right!?! You wouldn't think so.
But something is keeping me from buckling down and doing what needs to be done, and then I feel guilty about that, and then I get even less motivated, and then even more guilty! This is a bad cycle I am in! I need to just sit down and do it, because that will be the only way to get it done! But...ok, enough buts! I need to just do it, no matter how I feel.
Part of it is annoyance that I didn't get the grade I thought I deserved/earned on my last paper. Working hard and not having the hard work reflected in the grade is a good way to take the motivation right out of my sails. It should be just the opposite though. It should cause me to work even harder the next time around, and it will, but first I need to pout.
Ok, pouting is finished! I can now try to focus on what is on the agenda for today. Yesterday is over, I can't change what I did, or what the consequences were. I can just learn from it and move on. 1 B on a paper that is worth 7% of my overall for that class (and it was just 1% from an A) will not kill my gpa. I can still get all A's. I just need to remember that, move on from the bad grade and do better, and pray that when the rest of my papers are graded the profs are feeling kind, merciful and generous!
Have a blessed weekend, and hopefully next time I post I can report having finished this round of exams and papers!
In Christ,
JLK/PRT
PS- the book is still coming, but it is on the back burner for a couple of weeks as I focus on seminary. I will try to post an excerpt here soon.
1 comment:
Aloha i am fresh on here. I stumbled upon this forum I find It absolutely accessible and it has helped me out so much. I should be able to contribute & guide others like it has helped me.
Thanks, See Ya Around
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