You DON'T Deserve it!!!

One of Satan's biggest lies that he tells women is that we deserve what we get in life. That what is thrown our way is just. He uses the karma lie. Whatever is happening to you must be deserved, you must have done something wrong, it is fate that you are dealing with this.

This lie is perpetuated and blown up for many women that are living in abusive situations. Many of them really do believe the lie, they believe that it is their fault when their partner abuses them, that they provoked it, or disobeyed, or did something and the abuse is earned.

Another fallacy for many women in abusive situations is that this is just how life is. All guys are like this. These women were most likely raised in homes where abuse took place, and that is what they know. It is reality for them.

Both of these situations are lies and come straight from Satan. I know my Sophomore year of college when I was living in an abusive situation (and abuse can take many forms, it isn't always physical) I thought that it was what I deserved. I also told myself "well at least he isn't hurting someone else. I can handle it, I can't handle if he hurts one of my friends."

My thinking was screwed up. But, I had to own and believe that I deserved better before things would change. The abuser most likely will not change. We can pray for them and hope that they will, but most likely unless the woman owns that the situation is unsafe, that it is wrong, there is no impetus for him to change. I had to be the one to leave, I had to own it.

Just like all other women have to. It is scary, it is hard, and it is in a way humiliating. It hurts our pride to admit to ourselves how low we are, how low our self-esteem is. The first steps are always the worst.

But, the truth is simply: NO ONE DESERVES TO BE ABUSED... NO ONE!!! We are all beloved creations and children of God, the King of Kings. We are all royalty. He sees each of us, and He loves us. He wants to give us joy, peace, security, happiness, all the things that abuse steals.

God is consistent, He is patient and loving. You don't have to fear His moods, wonder what will happen tonight. You can let your guard down when you are with him. He also wants to show you that there are so many wonderful people out there that want to help, that want to love you.

There is a man (or woman) out there that God has for you. One that will treat you like the precious person you really one. There is some one out there that you can be with and not have to fear, someone that is a joy to come home to, that can bring real laughter to your soul, healing to you. Abuse is not right, abuse is the antithesis of love.

Choose to take the steps (I know they are scary, I've been there) to leaving the situation. Open yourself up for love, joy, and a life that isn't lived in fear. It is the hardest, most wonderful thing you can do for yourself and for your kids (if you have any).

-JLP-